CONTROVERSY QUEEN with Nomathemba Ndebele
When I started my blog and counterpart Facebook page, it was because I was feeling low since my original Facebook account had been suspended.
I asked myself what had become of this crazy world. Ia��d turn on the news and get depressed, Ia��d read the paper and take two more steps back, Ia��d scroll through Facebook and see the image of perfection every where I looked. Why does it feel like everyone has their s**t together but me? Surely I cana��t be the only one feeling like this. After reading a few other sarcastic blogs, I found the courage to put into words how imperfect I was – and to laugh about it, in hopes that others would laugh, too. I kind of thought that my contribution to this ailing society we live in is a dose of the best medicine – laughter.
So my goal was two simple things; to laugh – and be laughed at or with – it didna��t matter to me as long as I got people laughing. Little did I know, it too would be like swimming upstream and trying not to drown in the meantime from countless forces trying to fight me and the tide. Ia��ve been called names, Ia��ve been told I am not funny, Ia��ve been told a joke I posted doesna��t make sense. Ia��ve been told this or that is a�?no laughing mattera�? – Ia��ve been a victim of people mistreating me and calling me all sorts of crazy, un-ladylike things for the smallest, most innocent and even ridiculous posts.
I have never ever beenA� degrading, inappropriate, unkind, none of it. If poking fun of someone for recording a sex clipA� with full blown pubic hair makes me a bad person – then I guess I am a bad person. If using curse words now and again to tell a story or a joke makes me someone who is not classy then so be it.
No one knows that I am the first person to volunteer for things – especially when it comes to helping the less fortunate. No one knows that if I have $5 in my pocket, I give $4,99 of it away. I dona��t need to sit here and list my credentials on why I am a decent human being. I just am. I am good, I am kind, and I love to laugh. And yet the name calling and joke killing continues. Herea��s the thing though.
Out of almost 1 000 people, I can count about 20 people that have done this – but ita��s those 20 that hurt the most. Squeaky wheels that get the grease? These 20 people in all of our lives are why we say a�?mean people sucka�? or a�?I would be a people person, but I hate people.a�? and so many other one liners about hating being around people. So all of this makes me ponder one question . . .
Why let theA� one percent ruin it for the 99 percent that are good? WE are the 99 percent – and we are funny, sarcastic, smart, classy, wonderful people that CAN take a joke, that CAN laugh at ourselves, that CAN appreciate laughing to get through the day. I believe this you know. I do believe that the majority – and I mean strong majority of people are good – but when the bad come out and try to ruin it – we remember them because they inflict so much pain and damage with their words disguised as a�?opinionsa�? and a�?statementsa�? and they have rights too and blah blah blah that they actually suck the energy right out of a funny post. Wait a minute. Last I checked – this was MY page and MY outlet and so I consider it like MY house. So when people come to MY house and disrespect me or deconstruct a joke and get everyone all pissed off by their buzz killing nature, I get prickly. I hate banning people. I hate deleting comments. And OMG do I hate babysitting adults.
Why cana��t people just be cool. Dona��t like a joke? Then move along – ignore it – or better yet – unlike the page or dona��t read it!
Why would you take time out of your precious life to type a statement on why a joke is NOT funny. Why do people do that? Because some people thrive on being miserable. And misery loves company. Ita��s sad. Therea��s enough to deal with in our world as it is. Ita��s sad that even the people who are trying to make light of a scary world get s**t on so much – daily. The thing about humour is that if there is no victim, there is no joke. Humour is making fun of the absurd or ridiculous. And there is a whole lot of ridiculousness in this world.
One thing I have learnt is that I have stopped trying to make people happy. My definition of happy and someone elsea��s definition of happy are clearly two very different things. Some people are only happy being miserable. No thank you. I try to be positive and upbeat. Respectful and genuine. Thoughtful and kind. The one percent dona��t care about those things. They will be themselves no matter how something is presented – they are a**holes. That is that.
They will find a reason NOT to laugh every time. Whether ita��s pretending something is offensive or saying it doesna��t make sense or debating on why something is not funny – they will find a reason to kill the joke. I will continue to ban these people on my page. I would not put up with someone like that in real life – why would I put up with that in cyber space? Ita��s sad but so are they. I would feel sorry for them – but they dona��t want that. They want me to join them and I will not do that. I will continue to be me – I will continue on my quest to make the world a funnier, happier place, and I will continue to strongly believe that we the funny, the brave, the kind, the happy, are truly the 99 percent.
It is for these people that I will keep doing what Ia��m doing. I appreciate you, I thank you for your support – and if youa��ve read this far, thank you for letting me vent. Peace and love – laughter too. Thank you for reading. Until next Friday, chao!FollowA� @nomakartel on twitter