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Women’s Forum: Do not push her too hard

Nhlalwenhle Ncube

BEING a mother is the most challenging, un-exchangeable task, but hey! we do it all the time.

May God continue to give you strength, wisdom and unending grace to do it exceptionally well each and every time. HAPPY BELATED MOTHERa��S DAY!

Sisters, a lot of terrible stories have been reported about domestic workers (maids) and at the end of the day, as mothers we are blamed for inviting trouble to our families.

The maidsa�� behaviour has generated lots of debate as some are of the opinion that mothers are to blame while others call maids all sorts of names. Maids have been called husband snatchers, child abusers and all, but whose fault is it.

Having a maid is not a bad idea, but the way they are treated causes all the trouble in the family.

Always remember that a maid is there to assist you with certain house chores and there should be limits to what she does in the house.

If you decide to let the maid run your own house, then you are likely to lose your husband to her. She will have automatically replaced you.

To begin with, let the maid help you in taking care of the children not your hubby! I fail to understand women who let the domestic worker make their beds, wash and cook for their husbands while they just sit and watch. Remember the way to a mana��s heart is through his stomach.

Make it a point that your bedroom is yours and not anyone elsea��s. Do not push your husband into the maida��s arms.

Men are easily tempted and we have heard a number of cases where domestic workers end up snatching their employersa�� husbands. Most of the women invite trouble for themselves by letting maids be in control of their own household.

Clean up your own mess and never let the maid wash your husbanda��s underwear because thereafter she will never respect him!

All I can say sisters is that be in control of your households and never hand over your hubby to the maid.

Also remember that person is a human being with feelings, so give her days off rather than keeping her at work for the whole year. If you do that, she is more likely to turn to your husband for sexual pleasure!

We then come to the most disturbing issue where some women ill-treat maids. Remember that you need that person as much as she also needs the job.

Do not ever treat a maid as if she is desperate because at the end of the day she will want to prove a point and do something terrible either to you or your children.

Maids should be treated with respect as they are the ones who spend most of the time taking care of children. If you treat her badly, she is likely to revenge and nowadays they fix the employers by ill-treating the children.

Start by showing the children that the maid is part of the family and in that way you will have a good relationship. Sisters, do not turn maids into monsters!

FEEDBACK
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Thanks MaNcube for your column, eish on my side ita��s working so perfect and that yellow cloth selikhona endlini, kikiki. Keep up the good work.

Hi Sis Nhla or should I call you aunty. I like reading your column all the time. Thanks for everything you have taught us. I have changed how to treat my man in and outside the bedroom laye uyamangala. Keep it up. More tips aunty.

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Ubaba kumele ahlikihlwe kusale kubetha umoya.

Hey thanks for the column isifundisa okunengi, like you have said even after marriage couples should continue telling each other how much they love each other, the way they used to when they were boyfriend and girlfriend. The truth is that men are the ones who start to lose the spark and stop telling their wives how much they love them. As much as I remember mina my hubby last said those words to me when we were dating. Of course I know he loves me, but I want ukuzwa ezikhulumela ngomlomo wakhe, very few men do so.

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Leta��s keep chatting on nhlancube66@gmail.com or WhatsApp 0712978471.